Updated: Apr 2
Stress is one of the major factors in becoming physically ill. When a person experiences high levels of stress their cortisol levels rise and the immune system can become compromised. When around narcissistic or toxic people this is the sad reality for many abuse victims. Narcissist’s blame, scream, lie, manipulate, demean, humiliate, shout, argue and play every trick they have to maintain control over you. So what do you do when you find yourself on lockdown with a narcissistic spouse or family member?
The way that the body reacts to ongoing stress is that it puts the system under something called the ‘survival mode’. Being in the survival mechanism for long periods of time is literally killing the body. Research suggests that chronic stress contributes to high blood pressure, promotes the formation of artery-clogging deposits, and causes brain changes that may contribute to anxiety, depression, and addiction. More preliminary research suggests that chronic stress may also contribute to obesity, both through direct mechanisms (causing people to eat more) or indirectly (decreasing sleep and exercise). Living in the survival / stress response lowers your immune functioning too and leaves you vulnerable to infections (like the Corvid-19).
Many victims of narcissistic abuse stay in these situations not even knowing that they are in survival mode, many keep thinking that this person will change… eventually. That day will never com. In the meantime the victim is being harmed on every level by these pathological individuals. This is what is meant when you hear that the victim is literally being poisoned to death!
Many victims of narcissistic abuse stay in these situations not even knowing that they are in survival mode.
You can turn yourself inside out trying to please and meet the narcissist’s demands, but this will never be enough. The victim feels like a failure or not good enough further contributing to the cortisol levels in the body, weakening their immune system.
Its time to turn to your own welfare; your physical health, emotional and psychological wellbeing. We are in charge of our health. These days who go by the new book of throwing prescriptions at patients rather than going to the cause of symptoms can’t be trusted. One of the lessons of life is that we must take charge of ourselves on every level. We cannot expect anybody do this for us, its is our responsibility to take care of ourselves in every aspect. It is also not our responsibility to look after the narcissistic spouse or family member, our responsibility is to ourselves. We can research, consult with those who are very knowledgeable but ultimately it is up to us to make the right decisions for ourselves.
Being around narcissistic / toxic people allows the venom to sink into your own conscious and raises your stress levels. You deserve to be healthy and strong and part of this wellness is the strength of your immune system to fight off illness. I have been in communication with many spouses who have become physically ill as a result of overwhelming stress that they internalised that compromised their immune systems. Now at time where this is critical you must protect your health.
First and foremost—Think about yourself first–the narcissist should be very low on your list or not there at all. They have tried everything to make your life a living hell. You don’t need to take this anymore. Have a plan of action to keep yourself healthy. Learn to emotionally detach from the narcissistic individual . In many cases you make the decision to sever the relationship. Narcissists don’t have relationships; they are incapable of psychological or emotional intimacy.
You have insight into your inner self and all of your creative gifts and energies. You are entitled to live without the constant stress that is emblematic of life with the narcissist. You have come to a fork in the road. Choose the pathway that works for you.
Let me know your thoughts
How has your narcissistic relationship affected your health? Did you manage to leave and find that your health improved?