Judgement & The Narcissist



Judgement in terms of our own development and not how the narcissist judges us. We know that they do and we can see how this judgement only initiates negative momentum coupled with severe ego processes that have been allowed to get out of control. From this we can learn to witness judgement we have of ourselves and others. We can learn what triggers this feeling and therefore uncover and witness what our core wounds are. By doing this we are able to progress in our healing.

Judgement - both being judged and judging others, is all at the core of our discomfort and the root of many of our life blocks. When we judge others what and how does that make us feel? We get a hit of self-righteousness. Which makes us feel good at that certain point in time but what about the feelings and emotions that come up with it? They are negative.

Judgement is great at getting us through when we feel hurt, insecure and vulnerable. Shifting blame and attention on another person is easy and better rather than look at ourselves and see the lesson. But enviably this feeling of righteousness fades and judgement causes our energy to weaken and our thoughts to darken. Much like the narcissist, this is the state of ‘being’ that they are left in because the lack the ability to see a situation any other way. They are driven by negative energy therefore their thoughts and behaviours will be negative. Negativity breeds more negativity rather than coming from a place of authenticity.

I know it is easier to judge someone else and this has been conditioned into us from a young age in our society and culture. But we do not need to follow this damaging way of being, it only serves to ruin our soul and our lives in the long run. As I have always said, being stressed, anxious and sad produces a chemical compound called cortisol, which is a poison to our body. When this hormone flows through our body it damages our organs and prisons our blood and impacts the way we think and behave. Why do we do this to ourselves? (At times I am guilt of this too). Instead of embodying this negativity and poison we learn to live in an authentic and healthy way of existing and that means not judging.

When someone judges us, we feel bad and we feel as though a huge disservice has been done to us when someone thinks a certain way towards us. It hurts us … right? I remember when I was judged about driving a nice car. I was refused shifts and promotions because my manager didn’t like that I drove a nicer car than her. I had brought the car because I had gone through a very trying time in may life and the funds from the house sell were used to buy the car.

Each of us have a history, that cause us to react and behave in certain ways. We all have been through trying and difficult times, no one has it easy, no matter what anybody says, I know we all have our cross to bear. When we judge someone we are judging their past and present. We do not have that right, yet we think we do. Just like my ex-manager, she judged me and my past and present. I worked hard and studied hard, my life wasn’t made any easier because I had a nice car to show for it. I used money that was acquired by pain and hurt and getting rid of it allowed me to have something that I enjoyed for the time being to make me feel happy. That was judged and I felt that was not fair.

When we judge, we are doing the same thing, judging someone by their past and their present. We do that because it makes us feel better for that point in time. But that self-righteous feeling fades and we are left with the negativity. Which eventually destroys us. We see this is what happens from the narcissist and their behaviours.

When we shift our energy from defensive judgements to free flowing love, our lives get to feel amazing. You will attract exactly what you want, what you need, relationships will heal, your health will improve you will feel safer and secure in your life. Our loving thoughts one at a time create miracles. Spread more love and live your best life, the one you were always destined to live.

For your chance to win Gabby Bernstein’s “Judgement Detox” and accompanying journal watch the video below.


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